So many days I can’t stop myself
From fighting this monster that eats me alive
So many times I’ve fought and I’ve tried
To live for a moment without fearing my mind
I hate this, yet live this, and it’s bringing me down
I feel like I’m standing on uneven ground
The balance to life has been skewered so violent
I’m so sick of this death-instinct silence
So despondent and so somber, so frail
So scared to begin for the fear I will fail
I’m alone in this pattern and I can’t call for grace
I’m left in this mess that is such a disgrace
I fear for my mind more than I fear for life
The one thing worth saving is the love I deny
For I feel so hollow, and I yearn to relent
The control for some peace and freedom from this torment
There’s no one to save me and I can’t save myself
I would give my whole being for some kind of help
But no one can stop this god damn monster so great
All hope is now lost and it’s too late
I numb to forget, to quiet the noise
I’m deafened by silence, I can’t live with myself
I numb to forgive, for myself can’t forget
That I could’ve been someone without any regret
You lying man who tells a tale
Of flawless love and peace of mind
Of parting seas and curing blind
Your lies my faith, there’s no remorse
You spin your tale with brutal force
Your lies, my faith, my breathing grace
I ran from life, I erased my faith
I am so blind
And seeing eyes are not the kind